20 Ridiculous Things That You’d Only Ever See In Russia

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Sometimes, to the outsider’s eye, life in Russia can seem like something from an alternate dimension. Indeed, if you think Vladimir Putin bedspreads and posing in heaps of trash (or a puddle) is normal, then perhaps you might feel like moving there. But for everyone else, it only exacerbates the country’s reputation for the ridiculous. And yet, these 20 crazy photos may just pique your curiosity enough to pay the country a visit…

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Part of being a successful ruler is having the people adore you. And what better way to achieve that goal than merchandising your likeness? Yes, apparently you can purchase Vladimir Putin rugs in Russia. And then pose on them topless, to really show off your love for your president. Imagine having Donald Trump rugs…

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There’s so much going on in this photo that it might take your brain a while to process it all. Indeed, the longer you look, the worse it gets. Never mind the sausages – although on second thought, you probably should mind them – what’s that guy in the background doing? Why is the woman dressed like a bumblebee? And what’s with the numbers all over the dude’s jacket? Yes, we could stare at this photo for days and still be baffled.

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Now look. Sometimes, you just don’t have a funnel to hand. And in those instances, all you can do is improvise. After all, someone needs to drink that vodka. This is Russia. But the most hilarious aspect of this shot is how she’s holding up a towel to avoid getting messy while, erm, drinking her alcohol through a sandal. It boggles the mind.

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It’s not enough that you’ve outsmarted the fish by yanking it from its watery home. Yes, to really show it who’s boss, you’ve got to pose for a photo with it at gunpoint. In Russia, that’s the only real way to establish dominance over a fish.

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Apparently, driving a tank around isn’t the concern. The real issue is parking it in the wrong place. And if you’re not convinced that this is a regular problem in Russia, just ask yourself this: why do they have a clamp the perfect size for a tank track?

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Neither half of this couple looks happy with their current situation. Really, she’s probably just angry that he forgot his matching hat. And his grumpy expression, meanwhile, needs no explanation. Then again, we bet that he’s warm and toasty under all that fur, at least.

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Nothing says “I’m tough” like posing shirtless with a machine gun. Right? It’s a truly universal symbol, regardless of language barriers or borders. At least, that’s what’s presumably running through this guy’s mind. That dangerous level of thinking might explain that insanely odd haircut, too.

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Fashion shoots in Russia are decidedly low-key, apparently. Yes, this must be the logical result of not having a warm beach nearby. In fact, we’re actually surprised this doesn’t happen in other landlocked countries. After all, what could be sexier than lying in a puddle?

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Don’t even have a puddle to hand for your modeling shoot? No matter – just find the nearest pile of trash. To be honest, this is actually a pretty solid technique. After all, anyone’s going to look sexy when compared to a mountain of garbage.

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You know, this may be just another normal day in Russia. It’s easy to tell, because nobody on that beach seems to give two shakes that a massive submarine has just surfaced in stunningly close proximity. Indeed, perhaps this is merely the Russian equivalent of seeing a sailboat on the horizon. A sailboat possibly armed with nuclear weaponry, that is.

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Well, if you can’t go around firing your heavy artillery weapons, you might as well do something productive with them. To be fair, the artwork here is actually pretty impressive. We just can’t imagine it being particularly intimidating on the battlefield.

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We guess people in Russia may have had enough snowmen to last them a lifetime. It is pretty chilly up there, after all. That said, this does seem a little extreme. But more than the various axes, knives and saws, it’s the drill through the head that really just screams, “I’ve had enough of this.”

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When there’s no roadside parking available, you just have to get creative. Clearly, whoever drives this car is a genius. Just don’t ask them about getting it down in one piece. We have a feeling they might not be too sure of their answer.

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Some people might keep a toy car in their backyard for their kids, or even park their own truck out back. But nowhere outside Russia are you likely to see a massive airplane behind someone’s house. We’re just baffled as to how they managed to get it there in the first place…

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Okay, so while it’s possible some things can get lost in translation, there’s really no mistaking the word “vodka” for anything else. Indeed, it seems intravenous therapy in Russia consists of pumping the country’s staple drink right into the patient’s veins. Furthering those stereotypes might seem unfair, but photos like this just make it too easy.

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Here’s some handy travel advice: if you ever visit Russia, make sure to keep on your toes. After all, it seems it’s not only some of the people you’ve got to watch out for – but the animals, too. Then again, you have to wonder why a dog would need a knife. Maybe it just has sensitive teeth?

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Russians are well known for their ability to withstand temperatures that would surely kill off people hailing from warmer climes. Nevertheless, this girl understandably looks like she’s regretting jumping into what must be approaching a sub-zero pool. We wouldn’t advise holding onto the metal fence, though. Before she knows it, her hand will be frozen to that, too.

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While you’re probably used to seeing pet dogs on the subway, foxes are an entirely different ball game. Outside Russia, anyway. In Russia, people taking their sleepy foxes on the train is seemingly a regular occurrence. Indeed, the woman next to him isn’t even batting an eyelid.

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Don’t have a spare wheel to hand? Never mind. You could always give this a try. Quite how this car is meant to drive in a straight line, however, we’ll never know. It doesn’t even look strapped on. Still, you know what they say: six wheels are better than four. Probably.

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We’re not sure whether this parade is meant to show off the S.U.V.s or the guns. But either way, both seem like strange things to celebrate. Still, the guy in the back is adapting well to his lack of a sunroof, holding his firearm out of the window like he’s auditioning for the next Mad Max movie. Only in Russia…

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